Friday, February 4, 2011

Why are we so hard on ourselves?

    I'm not sure if it's just moms or women in general, but why are we so hard on ourselves? Most of the woman I know are moms, so I'll just talk about the moms right now.

   I know women who have a kind encouraging word for all of their friends. They find a bright spot in a person's day, some little positive thing to tell a friend who's having a bad day, or just some way to try to cheer up a friend. They have no trouble telling you all the great things about their friends/family/etc, but when it comes to themselves, they only see the negative. Why is it we can find the good in everyone but ourselves? Why is it we don't want to believe our friends who have kind words for us. We feel like we must say thank you, but we don't really believe the truth our friends see about us?

   Is it the magazines that show us pictures of the "perfect woman"? Because we all know most of those pictures are photo shopped. Is it the movies where the women have it all? (I don't really watch anything that isn't drawn and has a musical sound track to it, so I'm no expert on the new movies) Is it because we see the "stars" out with their babies and they've dropped the baby weight so quickly? We know those woman have the money to hire a personal trainer and a nanny to watch the kids while they work out. So why do we make the comparisons?

    I don't know the answers? I wish I did. But I do know I have some fabulous moms for friends. They make craft projects with their kids. Some take them out to the playground everyday, weather permitting. Some have moved Heaven and Earth to get their child the special help they need to deal with a child's special needs. (and believe me that is no small feat!!!) Some of my mommy friends homeschool (those lucky kids have the best teachers ever). Some make home made meals every day, others married men who know how to cook a home made meal (go you!!!). Others are great just because they tell/show their children how loved they are every day.

   These are just a few examples of what makes them great moms, but if you were to ask them what's so great about themselves, they'd hem and haw, they'd be able to tell you 10 things they wish they were better at right off the top of their head. But they'd look at all the accomplishments I've just listed and say Well that's just what moms do.

   So to all my mommy friends, know that you are awesome!!! Know that you are doing great things for your kids, just by being there for them and enjoying their everyday antics. And please write down a list of all the great things you do and post it somewhere you'll see it everyday. Shoot put it in your undies drawer on the top so no one but you sees it. And know that you are fabulous women. 

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